Every Christmas, my family gathers around the Youtube to watch Mariah belt out my favorite version of O, Holy Night.
And every Christmas, we have the same conversation
Dad: She’s half black? She doesn’t even look black at all.
Me: Yes, I promise you she’s half-black.
Dad: Well, she’s got hips like a black lady, but is she really half-black?
Mom: Shut up, it’s coming to the best part.
Dad: How can she sing so loud? Where are the microphones?
Me: There are no microphones. It’s a recording.
Dad: HUH? Are the microphones on the ceiling?
Me: No. There are no microphones…this is just a recording, not a live performance.
Dad: See? There are no microphones on the ceiling…
Me: Just listen, it’s the good part. Here comes the good part. Listen to how she hits the high note.
Dad: Mmm. The microphones must be in her dress.
Me: Yes, it’s in her dress.
Mom: You’re missing the best part! Can you please stop talking?
Dad: How do they fit the microphones in that dress? She can barely fit in the dress herself.
Me: They make them small.
Dad: She’s really half black?
Mom: Your father has ruined the song. Play it again.
Merry Christmas to all. Here’s hoping your family traditions are alive and well.