For a more equitable and just New York City, I suggest the following policies be enacted immediately:
- If small business establishments refuse or deny access to restroom facilities, I reserve my right as a flesh-and-blood human
being to pee on the side of the building.
- Irresponsible and unnecessary honking will be punishable by a suspended license and chopping off of hands at the wrist.
- “Recommended Price” means Recommended Price. Any Met patron who receives an accusatory glance from staff is entitled to $10 recommended compensation.
- A natural partition between normal New Yorkers and hipsters via a two-borough solution. Two boroughs for two people. So long
as they stay in Brooklyn, I have no problem with them.
- La Guardia and JFK should double their operational runways, bringing it to a stunning total of four.
- For the sake of uninterrupted rest, homeless people should be encouraged to ride the single subway line on Staten Island.
- Hardback and paperback books placed on the endangered species list.
- A cap and trade policy for cocktails and coffee, $15 and $2 respectively.
- Free grocery delivery.
- Promote free trade: Shake Shack for In’n Out
Bloomberg, make this happen and you have my vote.