Korea vs. Japan. Again.

LOOK!

It’s Kim Yuna of South Korea versus Japanese sensation Mao Asada in a figure skating DEATH MATCH for the ages! National pride on the line! A long history of cultural animosity about to erupt at the Vancouver Olympic Games!

I understand the rivalry between the two countries…I really do. Foreign occupation and a laundry list of war crimes will do that to nations.

But is anyone else embarrassed that this is playing out on an ice rink? A boxing match or a Judo competition or a soccer game, maybe I can understand…but ice skating?

Adults, take a deep breath. These are teenage girls not military heroines. Can’t we just enjoy some figure skating without the revenge subplot?

Apparently not.

People. This is embarrassing.

If we can’t find love in figure skating, we are certainly a doomed people.

And while I’m on the subject.

Triple Lutz?

Triple Toe?!

TRIPLE SALCHOW??

THEY’RE THE SAME MOVE! DOESN’T ANYBODY NOTICE THIS?

I FEEL LIKE I’M TAKING CRAZY PILLS!

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